My day started with a headache. Followed by a hellacious drive to the zoo. Two traffic backups. A bunch of jackwads who don't know how to drive. Arrival time: 1 hour late.
We hoofed it (pun intended) into the zoo to meet the others. They were by the carousel. All of the kids were clamoring to ride the carousel. Except mine. They "weren't in the mood." What the hell? These are not my children. You are 7 and 5 and you shouldn't even know what "being in the mood" means, let alone be using it correctly in a sentence. So, we sat out while the other 4 kids and 2 moms got their fun on. I took pictures of their smiles while my two little grouches sat on the bench and frowned. A lot.
Oh, but the fun start to the day wasn't over. We went to tropic world. You know, where there are gibbons and orangatans, monkeys and gorillas.
Hey, this guy looks grouchy just like me and my kids. Maybe we are related?
The 5 year old was miserable. He covered his ears. He said it was too loud in there. He didn't like the rainforest sound. He didn't like the water raining down over the animal exhibit, even though he was completely dry. He had a meltdown at the gorilla enclosure. He cried and said he wanted to leave. I said no, look at the gorilla and enjoy it. Yes, I did.
We left Tropic World. Five year old still in tears. I took a picture of both kids on the bench outside the building. Just look at the joy and glee. Soak it in.
Finally we moved on after a stern talking to about having fun. The kids put their heads in the toilet. Because nothing says fun like putting your head in the toilet.
Three different kids with their heads in the toilet.
We saw some animals. A few. Then all kids wanted to go to the playground. Yes, folks, we drove an hour to go to the zoo and pay for parking, to go to the playground. My kids have a playground down the street right around the corner that is FREE. Fucking little heathen monsters. But, alas it was lunchtime. So, we compromised. Lunch then playground then more animals. Everyone seemed cool with that.
At lunch, one of my mom friends told us there is an animal that her 4 1/2 is wondering if we will see at the zoo. It is the poocock. You know, if there is a peacock, there must be a poocock. I came very close to spitting out my lunch at the hilarity of that. Kids are so literal. So, we went searching for said animal, and found this:
I'll be damned...they do exist!!!! And they are apparently very happy creatures.
(Thank you to NationalGeographic.com, spreadshirt.com and Microsoft Paint)
We inhaled the scent of the penguin enclosure, which is always a nasal treat. My 7 year old even posed for a picture in front of the tarantula (behind heavy glass of course).
Yes, folks, there is a big hairy tarantula at the back of that terrarium.
We played in the "kitchen" exhibit in one of the houses. Like all of our kids have never seen a kitchen before. Cabinets are fascinating. Let's see if they open and close. Look at that big pretend fridge. OOOOO, and the kitchen has a window. Seriously?
Time to call it a day. As the curtain closes, now my kids are "in the mood" to ride the carousel. However, I can't complain. Just look at those smiles.
